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If a teenager believes the rules are unfair and there is no room to negotiate or make exceptions then the option to be deceptive and dishonest becomes their only choice.
If you demonstrate your willingness to trust your teenager by giving them more freedom they are more likely to act in a trustworthy manner.
Could you handle it if your daughter told you she wants to go on birth control? Many parents of older teens find the issues they confront difficult to manage, as the right way forward isn’t always clear.
By the time kids become teenagers telling lies to keep the peace or avoid trouble has become second nature. Your children develop a baseline level of acceptable lies or half-truths by watching you and how honestly you respond to situations in life.
Expecting teenagers to open up and give you honest answers about how their day was or what problems they are facing can lead to disappointment if they constantly observe you cover up how you feel and respond with polite white lies. Being proactive about negotiating rules and boundaries with your teenager is one of the most effective ways to reduce negative relationship outcomes in families. As discussed in the previous post one of the reasons teenagers lie is because they think parents won’t listen to them.
Likewise when your teen comes to you requesting that an exception be made to a rule or a permanent change made to a curfew then it is vital that as a parent you listen to their reasons.
Try to understand what is important for you teenager in this instance. Once you have listened to them think about what is at stake for you and see if you can find a compromise with your teenager.